Thursday, August 16, 2012

You LOOK Happy.

Top: Francesca's (similar) // Pants & Purse: TJ Maxx // Shoes: Target // Earrings: Premier Design // Bracelet: c/o Payton Woodcraft // Photos: Taylor Love Studios

Yesterday, I enjoyed lunch with my former Boise State advisor.
Though I still call her "Doctor,"
I don't still think of her as my advisor.
She is a friend, a support, and my mentor.

We get together every so often to discuss life, my job, what's new—
and yesterday was no different.
As we munched on our bagel sandwiches, the minutes went by so fast.

We talked about my job and how sometimes I feel like I'm in a rut.
I got my degree in Health Education and Promotion, and my full-time job is philanthropy
for a non-profit hospital.
I deal with money and donations all day, every day.
While going to school, I always said that I never wanted to do fundraising.
Now, it's my 40-hour-a-week full-time focus.
I told her I'd love to do community health, employee health, any kind of health promotion.
I told her I'd love to be a full-time blogger, but it just doesn't make sense right now.
My job, though sometimes tedious, is a wonderful job.
Good pay, amazing benefits, an office to myself, and a group of ladies who couldn't be sweeter.

We talked about my new life.
The life I found after my last relationship and since I've found God.
I don't know if she is a Christian or not.
I don't know what her beliefs are.
But she listened to me.
She listened as I told her about the people who still haunt me with my past.
She gave me advice about how to not let their words or actions hurt me.
She listened as I told her about my personal struggles,
and how forgiving myself for my actions was the hardest thing I've had to do. 
She listened as I told her about the "new love" I have come to know.
Especially with Daniel.

We talked about Daniel.
Oh, did we talk about Daniel.
We talked about how the love he shows me is so different than any love I've seen before.
We talked about his strength, and how hard we both had to work to overcome
all of the challenges during the last year.
We talked about some of my frustrations with him, which is really only one,
and yes, Daniel, it's your little bit of involuntary sarcasm that pokes right at my heartstrings.
But we mostly just talked about how much I'm in love with him.

We talked about all of the AMAZING that is right now.
Amazing opportunities.
Amazing adventures.
Amazing plans ahead.

As we walked out of the bagel shop and said our goodbyes,
she said one thing to me that really made a difference.
She said,
"You look happy."

That was so reassuring.
I am so grateful that she said that.

Through everything I've been through over the last year and a half,
ups, downs,
marriage and divorce,
drastic weight loss and weight gain,
hurting so many of the people who surround me,
as well as myself,
I didn't look happy.
I looked sad. Alone. Lost.

Now, that has all changed.
And let me tell you,
I don't just look happy.
I am happy.

Aunie Sauce

38 comments:

Chloe Jacqueline said...

I am so happy that you are happy as well as radiating happiness! You deserve it! You also deserve these wonderful people in your life! I am so happy for you! =)

Jay said...

I think that's the nicest comment someone can give, "You look happy."

Kate said...

I'm so happy for you Aunie! I'm glad to hear that you're doing so well. You go girl!

Katelyn said...

This post is beautiful. It makes my heart happy to know how truly and genuinely happy you are in your life. I think so many people get caught up in the fact that one thing in their life may not be perfect (in your case, feeling "stuck" in your job) and they automatically are completely discontent with everything. It's so refreshing to hear you say, "here are things I'm not necessarily over-the-moon happy about, but I'm still genuinely happy with my life." It's inspiring, Aunie. Thank you for sharing this post.

- Katelyn

Miranda @ All Things Lovely said...

:) This post just makes my heart smile. SO happy for you! And how awesome to have your old college advisor as a mentor. I hope to have that with my supervisor from my internship this summer!! She's like me but 10 years older <3

Mackenzie @ Life of a Pint-Sized Mama said...

What a beautiful moment. Happy for you!

Danette Dillon said...

Awesome. Isn't wonderful to be happy?

First, I have those same sandals on today! As I was reading your post I was overwhelmed with how similar it was to my day yesterday. I had lunch with my former advisor too.

It's funny how meeting with people from you past can either center you in your purpose in life or derail you. I love meeting with people and listening to people who help me remember everything I was created to me. It helps me stay focused.

Christ makes all the difference, doesn't He?

Love this post.

Kassie Rew said...

This is a post that as I was reading my heart was saying, yes, yes, yes.

Oh...how I hate being haunted by my past. Sometimes others cause that to happen, sometimes its myself, sometimes its dreams while I sleep. Its one of the worst feelings because it just leaves me feeling in not such a good mood.

I think about a relationship I was in about 3-4 years ago and how it left me more broken than I've ever known, more depressed, more of a mess...and how life is so different now. I have a wonderful husband who treats me well and loves me like no one else ever could. I'm sooo thankful for him and how God brought us together.

I like it when people tell me I look happy because there really is more meaning in it... it means that people can tell we've really changed, our hearts have changed... such a good feeling!

Thanks for sharing!

Stesha said...

this is just a great post! I love that you have found happiness and it is real true happiness! Happy Thursday love!

xxS

Miki {Becoming What I Always Was} said...

I love this post. I am so glad that you have found happiness. Sometimes it really does help reassure you that you're on a good and healthy path when someone can see how happy you are feeling.

Leona said...

I'm really glad that you are happy :) everyone deserves that in life!

Your hair looks so gorgeous in the button at the bottom, it's making me want to take up a Bye Bye Beehive challenge myself, I very rarely straighten my hair anymore but I will blow-dry it a fair bit... It would also be nice to learn to do things with it, take the time to use my hair for all the beautiful things it is there for!! If it looks as healthy when I'm finished, as yours does then i'll be a very happy lady!!x

Faith said...

What a beautifully written post. It is a blessing to not only look happy but to be happy.

Beth @ Shug in Boots said...

it's so easy to get lost in life and your own decisions - each one made carefully, of course. keeping up and keeping on. who to listen to and what path to take. then, one day, you wake up and wonder where "you" went, and you learn to listen to yourself and your own heart and mind and trust God to handle it. at least, that's what happened to me. it was scary to just do a 180, but now, i feel so much more myself now, and things are going great and i have no doubt God is in control and knows just what He's doing. Glad you are finding your happy! :)

Miss Country Dancer said...

soo glad you are happy!! hopefully that happiness stays for a while. thanks for sharing with us. hugs! <3

"happiness is a choice"

Lindsay @ Trial By Sapphire said...

Happiness shines from the inside outward. :-)

Jenna said...

I love reading your posts. Always so deep and thought-provoking. Isn't it wonderful when everything just seems to fall into place and true happiness overcomes us? I'm happy for you!

Baylee said...

:) Good for you!!! I'm glad you are happy. And look it. It's always good to look it too. Lookin' happy is hawt! ;)
Happy Thursday Girl!

Amanda Lambrechts said...

I love reading your posts! They are always so well written.:) And of course, I am very glad that you are happy! That is the best compliment a girl can ever receive!

Selma said...

That's a beautiful post :) I know how hard it can be to overcome hard times and to forgive yourself for the mistakes and the things you've done which hurt both you and the ones you love. I'm glad you're happy, and I can say your friend is right: as far as I can see it from the pics you post here, you definitely look happy. Take care!

Lily Garay said...

This is truly beautiful! It's so important to have those kind of people in your life:)

jess said...

Awww -- I just love this, girl! You are so inspirational. xoxo

Elisha(: said...

Good friends are vital in life I think. They truly build you.

You deserve to be happy! You are beautiful, and I just can't tell you how much your posts make me think, and how much they encourage me! <3

xo.

Kristen Danielle said...

I think it's so wonderful that you still get together with your advisor from Boise State.

Congrats on all of your achievements & personal growth! That''s great! xoxo

Anna said...

man, i love role models like that. :) Absolutely keep in touch with her!!

Chelsea said...

I read this post during my lunch break & was unable to comment on it until now. Just re-read it and once again...you gave me chills! True happiness, when you finally find it, is such a wonderful, wonderful thing. XOXO!

(You inspired me tonight!!!)

Katie said...

This is a beautiful post and it made me so happy. For you. For me, knowing that I know that feeling and am glad to be on the "happy" side. So happy for you that you are there too :)

Chelsea said...

Your posts are always so refreshing and inspirational. What an amazing thing that you have this person in your life.

Allyssa said...

I'm glad you're happy! You deserve to be :)

Lyndsay Dennis said...

This was beautiful. You deserve all the happiness in the world, miss aunie. :)

Thank you for sharing your happiness through your words every day. <3

Lisa @ MMT said...

Aw such a beautiful post! I am so glad you have found happiness! You've been through a lot in the last couple years, I bet it is refreshing to be in a happy spot in life.

Whitney H said...

Happiness is the best thing you can have. I'm glad to hear that you're happy. I'm getting there!

Jessica Day said...

I LOVE THIS!!

ah.

Jessica @ Lovely Little Things said...

This post makes my heart happy :)
You're so great, Annelise! It's so fun watching your heart open up!

xo

Amanda said...

I'm so glad you're happy! And what she may not know is that not only are you *happy* - but you have JOY! Joy from Jesus!!! What a blessing.

<3

Melanie Marie said...

Just found your blog and I love it!

Love the chambray and red jean combo! I've done it a time of two myself - such a great go-to look.

I'm your newest follower! Also, I linked up on Just Because Friday. :)

Melanie
Style to Stage

Janna Renee said...

Will is very sarcastic too, and I had to get used to it! Sometimes he goes a bit far, but he apologizes when he sees that he's upset me. I am glad you are happy girl!

Kaleigh said...

That is the BEST feeling, the best sentence. I read your post and I felt what you were feeling. I've always found that, whether in a good place or not, meeting up with people who ground us and want us in their lives and care deeply about how we ARE is the most rewarding feeling. I'm such a sucker for quality time + doing the things that make our hearts sing. I sort of fell into health communications and I, like you, am so so glad. Thank you for sharing this simple moment and letting us all be a part of it, too.


Kaleigh at www.rewritinglife.net

Annelise @ Aunie Sauce said...

Thank you so much, Kaleigh. That comment really means a lot! It's all about that feeling :)

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